Very Sad Loves Story

yeh mera first love h........... jo pura nai huya.....mera naam Sanjay h..mera ek seedha ladka hu bachpan se, kisi se jyada baat nai karta hu..ladkiyo se to bilkul bhi nai,, jaha ladkiya hoti weha se mai milo dur baag jata.. aaj tak khabhi narjre nai milai ladkiyo se........

yeh baat tb ki h jb mai class 12th mai padta tha yani 2011. hamare school mai 10th mai ek ladki padti thi jiska naam poonam tha.. mai usse like karne laga tha..wehh 3 bhai bahan the.. uss ki didi meri class ke B section mai thi aur bhai 7th mai tha.. mai prayer mai jane ke dar se schl deri se aata tha par jb se mujhe uss se love huyato mai time se aane aga tha kyuki weh prayer karane 3 ya 4 ladiyo ke saath aage jati thi.... mujhe ussko jayada baar dekne ki himmat nai hoti par 2-3 baar dekh leta tha....jab wo muskurati to mai bhi hasne lagta tha aur jab roti thi to meri aaakho mai aashu aa jate the..

ek din mai schl se seediya chadkar uppar ko ja raha tha to weh uppar se neeche ko aa rahi thi, par wo apne frnds ke saath thi,, hum theek raate ke paas mile aur unhone mujhe pahle jane ke liye bola,, pr mai nai gaya, mai side ho gaya,, mai dusri aur muh karte huye bola ki aap chale jao....aur weh sb log chale gaye, mujhe yaad h ki ussne peeche mudkar dekha tha....ab to mai ghar ko jane waqt bhi usss se aaghe jata aur mudkar peeche ko dekhu to weh bhi mujhe dekhti thi.... mujhe shak tha ki ussse mujse bhi pyaar ho gaya tha, par yakin nai tha....kyuki mai ussse jyada nai dekhta tha taki kisi ko shak na ho jaye.... jb mai schl nai aata to weh meri class mai jakti thi.... interwel ke waqt hamesha mai akele khada hota tha.... aur weh as pass khdi ho jati to mai dur chale jata,,,, ek din to mujhe lagta tha ki ussne mujhe propose kiya,,,, kyuki hum chadeewari mai the schl roof ki, to mai last kone tha aur weh beech mai thi, auur hamare beech lagbhaag 6-7 bacche the .... aur weh weha se haaath hila rahi thi,, . aur muskura rahi thi maine bhi haath hila diya.. par uss time wo kmina dobara aa gaya(kamal)  sayad ussko pata tha ki hum ek duss re se love kte h.... ab maine  class mai ek ladke ko ye sb btaya kyuki frnds mai share to hota hi(yehi wo cheez jisko maine galat kiya)ussne kaha ki mai uss ladki ko janta hu,, kyuki weh pahle mujse pyaar karti thi..maine kaha kya weh tujhse ab bhi love karti h..to weh bola ha karti h.. aur aisa bhi bol raha tha ki hamare beech pahle se hi thoda kuch h.... uss ne kaha agar tu kehta h to mai tere liye baat karta hu uss se,, mai ha keh di,, aur bolne laga ki 1 month lag jayega baat karne mai..maine haa kar di...

ab mai khus tha.... kyuki mujhe jindigi mai jo chahiye tha wo mujhe mil raha tha.... par yeh meri galatpahmi thi kyuki ussne mujhe dokha diya.... uss ne seedhe keh diya ki kaam nai huya.... maine kaha tujh se ab vishwaas uth gaya bhai.. 1 month tk maine bhi kuch nai kiya.. ab december aa gaya tha... iss ke baad chuttiya pad jati to jo karna tha mujhe karna tha... par uch jayada nai ho saka bus itna pata chal gaya ki wo love karti thi mujhse, aur mai bhi... january mai chuttiya.. february mai pre board aur practicls... phir kaha ki board wale ghar mai hi rah kar self study karo.... last time tb dekha jb hamara physics ka paper th 18 march ko tha.. aur unka english........uss din mai bahut khus tha kyuki aaj ussko ek mahine baad dekhunga, par ussne mujhe ignore kar diya,,,, pata nai kyu.......uss din se yehi sochta hu ki ya to ussne mujhe nai dekha.. agar dekha to ignore kyu kiya.... ignore kiya to phir weh kya tha jo weh school mai tha hamare beech......par ek baat to h wo mujhse  i love u nai bol paayi aur na hi mai....aur weh isss saal ki 3 rd number ki topper h yeha ki.....par mujhe uss se acchi ladki ab nai milegi.... maine uss ke naam apni zindigi kar di h..... mujhe ab bhi yaad h ki 18 march ke baad maine ussko 25 apri ko 1 second ke liye chalti car mai dekha aur last time.... 2 second se liye usski jalak dekhi 31 june ko dekha........................... par mai itna janta hu ki-------------------- she likes me a lot but i dont know she loves me or not